There’s this old saying about variety being the spice of life, but I think maybe salt is. Sure, some people may argue that it’s cumin or saffron, but to me, salt has universal appeal. It makes everything better—in moderation, of course. Salt makes food more foody. There’s also this old saying about how if you […]
Canary
Posted inOpinion
Don’t breathe easy, California
E.B. White wrote, in Charlotte’s Web, that crickets chirped “Summer is dying, dying.” That’s one of the reasons I never invite any of those bugs to my parties. They’re so maudlin. That, and they tend to not use coasters. But here we are, post-heat-wave, post-fireworks. Sunburned skin has either deepened to a tan or is […]
Posted inOpinion
Don’t wait to be told to have compassion
There are certain buttons of mine that, when pushed, reliably (predictably?) produce a column. It’s probably due to the fact that my great-grandmother on my father’s side was a parrot. I have a bit of the squawk in me, in case you haven’t noticed, and it doesn’t take much to get me crying out: “Political […]
Posted inOpinion
Light up the night (but not anything else)
Fireworks and marijuana. They have more in common than you may think. You light one end and hope that what comes out the other will make for an entertaining evening. Also, they’re both illegal. Kind of. Actually, you’re allowed to fire one up, as long as it’s OK with local regulations. Lompoc should know. And […]
Posted inOpinion
Leeches and fleas and ticks–oh my!
Sure, vampires are sexy these days, but back in Bram Stoker’s era, they were less sparkly and more, well, greasy. Dracula, as he was first written, had a unibrow, a scraggly goatee, and hairy palms. He wasn’t the sort of undead guy who would wind up on a teen girl’s poster, is what I’m saying. […]
Posted inOpinion
Got any change?
Some famous person or other once said, “The more things change, the more they stay the same.” I don’t agree. I think the more things change, the more they change. That’s what change is: change. Right? In my experience, people don’t like change. They like stuff to stay the way it is, the way it […]
Posted inOpinion
Too fit to quit
Guess what? I’ve started a new health regimen! I know, I know, it sounds cliché, but staying healthy is important. What, may you ask, triggered this new health kick? No, it’s not a New Year’s resolution. Here’s how it went down: I was sitting on my couch the other night, chowing down on some buttered […]
Posted inOpinion
‘Round and ’round we go!
I love carousels. Like, those old-fashioned kinds with the fancy prancing horses with flaring nostrils and the flaking gilt curlicues and the slightly off-key calliope music. Wait, did I say I love them? I meant to say that they creep me out. But I love to be creeped out, so I guess we’re all good. […]
Posted inOpinion
Much too hot to handle
I have no problem speaking truth to power. Or at least my opinion to power. If I’m mad about an legal loophole in an out-of-date law, I’ll say something about it. If I think a local elected official is being particularly boneheaded, I’ll speak up. The hope is that someone will hear me—or others like […]
Posted inOpinion
News with an opinionated twist
Sometimes I really wish I was a full-time staff writer for the Sun. I love writing my column (now every week!), but every once in a while I get the urge to sink my beak into some hard news. Case in point: I wanted to cover that press conference at which former Lt. Gov. Abel […]
Posted inOpinion
It’s about time!
The announcement was cryptic, in a sort-of boring sort of way. It arrived by e-mail: “Please find attached a press release concerning Assembly Bill 65. AB 65 was approved today by the Senate Public Safety Committee with a unanimous vote.” But for those in the know, this little bit of legal-process jargon meant it was […]
Posted inOpinion
Gaze into the future
Behold, the Great Canarini! I know and see all! Tremble at the terrible power of my prognostication! While I love this column, I do sometimes enjoy a little more theatricality than it typically allows. So I’ve been trying out some other things. I found a cool glass sphere at a local thrift shop, and then […]
