Just visited Santa Maria for the first time tonight. My God, what happened there?
The whole city looks like a hospital ward in a horror film after dark.
Whatever you’re trying to save with the Alien Microwave Orange —the environment, money, whatever—it isn’t worth it.
It makes Newark, N.J., seem downright homey by comparison.
So you got played by some politician whose brother was having trouble moving a million hideous light bulbs. It happens. Pick yourself up, lick your wounds, and move on.
Total darkness would be FAR more appealing. It felt like being in an insane asylum in a post-World War III fallout zone in a Stephen King film. Just seeing them recede in my rearview made me shudder.
This article appears in Sep 29 – Oct 6, 2011.