I’m surprised it took this long, I honestly am, but I can finally say it: I’ve got a Trumpian nickname. Thanks to Justin Ruhge, my buddy from Lompoc, you can now call me the “Yellow Canary” if I write anything you don’t like.
But Ruhge isn’t the only one upset with me! Another Lompoc Valley resident, Jan Lipski thinks I have a “forked beak” when writing about President Donald Trump. You know the argument: “But Hillary!” followed by a, “Trump is a business genius!”
It’s nice to know I have so many adoring readers, those who hang on to every word from my barbed beak. See what I did there, Jan? I used alliteration; it has a better ring to it than “forked beak.” Also, how would a beak be forked? A tongue could be forked, like snake, if that’s what you were going for.
Lipski also said I should stay in my lane and just talk about local issues. Even though she’s totally wrong about the president, I will oblige!
The Santa Maria City Council was more than a bit embarrassing when considering its ordinance regulating recreational cannabis in the city limits. City staff giggled about “trick questions” in regards to how much marijuana plants smell and other questions from the dais.
There was tons of concern about the smell of marijuana plants, you know, in Santa Maria, where we cover broccoli fields in manure. Councilmember Mike Cordero was the soberest person on the subject on the dais, mostly because he actually has experience as a former Santa Maria Police Department drug enforcement and DARE officer. Other councilmembers were concerned about the six plants allowed for personal cultivation under Proposition 64.
“Having stood next to six plants many, many times … I just didn’t recognize that as terribly offensive,” he said.
Later, Councilmember Etta Waterfield floated again the idea of banning all deliveries, including medical, in the city with some vocal support from Mayor Alice Patino. The one doctor on the council, Michael Moats, did have something to say about that though, arguing that chemotherapy patients and severe pain patients deserve delivery services.
“You know what Dr. Moats, if a person is dying or is in terrible pain and anything else, they don’t have any of their meds—their Percocet or anything else—delivered to their home right now,” Patino said. “Somebody else goes and gets it for them.”
“Well, that’s not entirely true either,” Boyson interject. “They deliver, pharmacies do deliver.”
“Oh, OK, I didn’t think they did,” Patino said before quickly moving along to Cordero’s comment before the final vote.
“Even though we’re not allowing the marijuana, we’re trying to divorce ourselves from any use or involvement with marijuana in the city of Santa Maria, we are still going to have to deal with the residuals of that,” Cordero said at one point during his comment.
Imagine that, the person on the council with the most experience with cannabis sees the issue with the clearest eyes. Well, he’s not up for re-election this year, but Waterfield and Boyson are.
Santa Marians voted for Proposition 64 with only a few hundred more yes votes, so the city’s voting bloc is about divided in half on the matter. But hey, with the new district elections going into their first year, there’s no telling how issues like this could factor in to the election.
It’s going to be an interesting year!
The Canary is ready for anything, and keeps its nicknames for everyone to itself. Send your thoughts to canary@santamariasun.com.
This article appears in Jan 25 – Feb 1, 2018.