In this world, nothing can be said to be certain, except death, taxes, and long lines at Disneyland. Benjamin Franklin may not have lived long enough to assert the third premise, but I’m sure the folks over at the Haunted Mansion can attest to the late statesman rolling in his grave over it.
For the first time in nearly a year and a half, grim, grinning ghosts are coming out to socialize—albeit at least 6 feet apart—with mortal guests of the beloved theme park, as it celebrated its grand reopening to the public this month. Once I found out the park was operating at 25 percent capacity, I jumped at the chance to buy tickets for my girlfriend and me. Fewer people, shorter lines, same churros—take my money now!
It’s a Wednesday and we arrive at the park around 10 a.m., just an hour after opening time. Our temperatures are scanned before we’re even allowed to leave the parking garage area, and once we get to the front gates through the standard security check, the visible lack of crowds is quite promising for the day ahead.
In lieu of the traditional photo ops with Disney characters, Mickey Mouse and his compatriots are hanging out near the staircase to the Main Street USA train station, blocked off from meeting guests up close but waving, dancing, and posing nonetheless for passersby to take selfies from just below the stairs. Minnie, Goofy, Pluto, and even Chip and Dale are present, but Donald Duck is strangely absent. Maybe he forgot to bring his mask today? Typical Donald—gets away with showing up to work pantsless for years, but maskless ain’t gonna slide.
As we stroll down Main Street, the sidewalks and main road are refreshingly spacious and decently devoid of other roaming organisms, minus a couple of trolley drivers, one of whom honks for me to get out of the way as I pause in the middle of the road to take a not-so-snappy Snapchat story.
The first gateway we venture into is Fantasyland, which we enter through the iconic Sleeping Beauty castle. Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride, the Mad Tea Party, Dumbo the Flying Elephant, and Pinocchio’s Daring Journey are among the rides we’re able to enjoy with ease (only five- to 10-minute wait times for each) before we cross over into Tomorrowland for Space Mountain and Star Tours (both with relatively quick wait times as well, compared to a typical pre-pandemic day at the park).
Our rose-colored glasses start to lose their tint as we head to New Orleans Square however, where the crowds appear almost robust enough to make me question whether the park is actually following its 25 percent rule. But things start to make more sense as we wait in line for Pirates of the Caribbean, which looks excruciatingly long at first. But once you’re in, it moves fast; it only looks long because each party of guests is amply spaced out from one another.
Still, I must say, this line is particularly tricky for those outside the line to maneuver around; thus amplifying the uneasy, crowded feeling at this narrow part of the park. At the other side of New Orleans Square, the equally long line outside the Haunted Mansion nearly gets entangled with the Pirates one.
But both rides are just as fun as they’ve always been, there’s no denying that. And Thunder Mountain, nearby in Frontierland, is more fun than ever, with the shortest wait time in terms of the bigger rides (about 10 minutes). We go on twice, once before lunch and once after. A late-ish lunch, I should say. It’s about 4 p.m., although we ordered our food around 2 p.m. (most of the restaurants in the park only accept mobile orders in advance an hour or two prior, so be sure to order your food much earlier than the time you’ll be hungry for it).
In between our chicken strip meals at the Stage Door Cafe and the park’s closing time (current closing hours are a bit early at 7 p.m.), we walk off our full bellies, get them full again with churros for dessert, venture into the Star Wars Galaxy’s Edge area for the first time (for both of us), and enjoy an epic finale to our day plummeting 50 feet down the famous Splash Mountain drop. I’ve never longed for a poncho so much in my life.
Arts Editor Caleb Wiseblood wants to know your favorite Disneyland ride at cwiseblood@santamariasun.com.
This article appears in May 20-27, 2021.