I can literally smell marshmallows as I proceed cautiously down a corridor in Universal Studios’ Ghostbusters maze. Well lo and behold, who’s waiting for me right around the corner? Just the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, nothing to freak out about.
A few guests in front of me stop and stare at the jolly cream giant towering before us. My fight-or-flight response kicks in, and I want nothing more than to politely shove them out of my way and sprint the heck out of there—but it’s too late. I stay in line and avoid eye contact, but the demon’s cold gaze never breaks. His beady-eyes—even more menacing and soulless juxtaposed with his big, cuddly stature—follow me until I’m finally outside the exit.
“Well, who’s up for Killer Klowns from Outer Space next?”
It’s all about atmosphere when it comes to Halloween Horror Nights, Universal Studios’ annual autumn tradition, offered at both parks (Hollywood and Orlando). I wasn’t exaggerating about the marshmallow smell; it’s part of the ride. Seeing and hearing the horrors that occupy each haunted house (or “maze” as they’re referred to) just isn’t enough—sometimes we’re forced to smell them too.
However, none of the scare actors (the humans behind the marshmallows) are allowed to touch us, and we’re not allowed to touch them either. But there are a few gray exceptions to the rule here and there; stay away from Slimer unless you wanna get squirted with … well … whatever he squirts guests with. Water I hope?
I’ve been going to Universal’s Hollywood event every Halloween since 2011; I guess I’m just waiting for the right maze to scare me into never returning. Some of my favorite movie-themed attractions over the years have included The Shining, The Exorcist, and The Thing, which were all beautifully terrifying (if you’re unfamiliar with the event, the mazes change every year).
This year’s standout for me is Us, based on Jordan Peele’s hit horror film of the same name. The entrance to the maze resembles the super creepy Santa Cruz funhouse in the film’s opening. And surely enough, as soon as you enter, you’re in a hall of mirrors. Get ready to meet your very own Tethered doppelganger. I won’t spoil the film for those who haven’t seen it, but what I love most about the maze is how well it captures even the smallest nuances (kudos to the actor performing as Tim Heidecker’s character and mastering the memeable psych moment).
But even the event’s goofier mazes—such as this year’s aforementioned Ghostbusters and Killer Klowns from Outer Space—are more visceral and “gorrific” than you’d probably expect based on preconceived notions of their source material. There’s a big difference between watching stock characters become prey to extraterrestrial circus folk on a screen and becoming said prey yourself. E.T. phone home? More like RUN HOME SCREAMING.
Getting entrapped in a cotton candy cocoon might sound fun on paper, but go ahead and try it sometime. And speaking of candy horror, I hate to keep harping on Marshmallow Man, but he’s just so much scarier in person, and arguably far more fleshed out than his cinematic counterpart.
Other spectacularly gruesome mazes this year include House of 1,000 Corpses, Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman, and last—but certainly not least—Stranger Things. There’s even a Stranger Things-themed ice cream bar near the ride’s exit, based on Scoops Ahoy from the show’s third season (which I still haven’t finished).
After escaping the clutches of the show’s dreaded Demigorgon, I’m tempted to wait in line for some cookies ’n’ cream, but I don’t want to spoil my appetite. My heart’s already set on dinner at Cletus’ Chicken Shack in Krusty Land, which isn’t decorated in any special Halloween way like the park’s other themed areas. I guess they figured Krusty the Clown is scary enough on his own.
Arts Editor Caleb Wiseblood can still smell those marshmallows. Send graham crackers and chocolate to cwiseblood@santamariasun.com.
This article appears in Oct 31 – Nov 6, 2019.
