It may be hard for the living to accept, but death is a part of life.
To help family members deal with their grief and to honor loved ones who have died, Marian Hospice is holding two special community memorials.
Light Up a Life ceremonies will be held Dec. 1 at First Methodist Church, 311 S. Broadway, in Santa Maria and Dec. 8 at Bethany Lutheran Church, 135 South E St., in Lompoc, both at 6:30 p.m. During the ceremonies, there will be music and a reading of names of loved ones who have died.
“I think it’s really powerful for people to hear and feel the name of a loved one read,” said Tina McEvoy, Marian’s director of hospice and palliative care.
Recent hospice client Linda Sullivan said she’s looking forward to attending the Santa Maria Light Up a Life because it will give her family and her an opportunity to honor Bill, her husband of 49 years, who died last year from chronic lung problems.
“We’re working at trying to keep the Christmas spirit going,” Linda said. “It’s what he would have wanted.”
Linda and her son Don said Bill loved Christmas. He would often put on a Santa suit for their grandchildren, and the whole family would go caroling. He and Linda also turned a portion of their pool repair business, Mr. Poolman, into a Christmas supply store during the winter months.
Bill and his family received in-home hospice care from nurse Kim Passmore for about six months before Bill succumbed to his ailments on Christmas Day.
“He promised to make it to Christmas,” Don said. “[Later on] he told me, ‘I don’t think I can, son.’ But he did.”
Both Don and Linda said they couldn’t have cared for Bill without Marian Hospice, which offers a variety of services, including nursing, spiritual support, and even housecleaning.
“Being a hospice nurse isn’t just about giving people their meds,” said Passmore, a Marian Hospice nurse. “That’s an important part, of course, but it’s also about helping the family learn to say goodbye.”
Linda said it took her a long time to say goodbye to her husband, but she eventually learned to let go.
“He was my husband, but he was also my partner, in business and at home,” she said. “He was my best friend. He’s still my best friend. I still feel his spirit all the time.
“But the big thing is that Bill’s not in any more pain. He doesn’t have to fight anymore,” she added.
Linda said she hopes the Light Up a Life event will help other people cope with their grief, too, and that it will give them hope and “reassure them that people do care.”
“We’ve had so much support from Hospice and from the community,” she said. “Bill would like that. He loved the community. It was always important for us to do things in the community.”
For more information about Marian Hospice and the Light Up a Life event, call 739-3830 or visit marianmedicalcenter.org.
Managing Editor Amy Asman compiled this week’s Community Corner. Send comments or ideas to the Sun via e-mail at intern@santamariasun.com.
This article appears in Dec 1-8, 2011.
