Michael Phelps is cool and all, but Jason Lezak is my new hero. By the time you read this, you’ll have heard all about him. (If you follow the news at all, that is.)
The 32-year-old veteran swimmer had the race of his life the night of Aug. 10—otherwise known as the morning of Aug. 11 in China—in the men’s 4-by-100 relay, a race that the French team, amazingly, was favored to win.
And they were winning, by half a length on the final stretch, when I said, “Well, it looks like we’re getting silver.” But Lezak made me a liar. Tapping into some crazy store of energy, he began to gain on his opponent.
He pulled up level—it was gonna be close—and then they hit the wall. Lezak beat the Frenchie by a fraction of a second, and the crowd went wild. My boyfriend Anthony and I went wild. And the relay team went berserk.
It was the best race of this Olympic games so far. Man, am I glad I didn’t go to bed early. Work be damned—I’m staying up late every night for the next two weeks.
I’m writing this column on Monday morning after watching the Olympics all weekend. I’m probably watching the Olympics right now, as you read this. They’re playing online, too, you know. Deadlines? What deadlines?
So far, I’ve seen some exciting moments, heard some ridiculous commentary, and fallen asleep while watching badminton. It was awesome—not the badminton, that was boring—but the rest was great.
I’ve always had a soft spot for the Olympics. They’re everything that’s great about sports rolled into one package. Athletes put it all on the line. They don’t hold back, and that makes for the best viewing, whether it’s a contest between two fencers or a showdown on the track.
Then there’s the drama. Athletes can be the best in the world and still lose at the Olympics, because it all comes down to one event, one race, and one chance. The medal goes to whoever wants it the most.
This is also China’s one chance to make a good impression on the rest of the world, and they want it badly. If they fail to impress us now, they’re not likely to get another shot anytime soon. In my last column on the Olympics, I complained about the choice of Beijing as the venue for 2008. I’m not taking back what I said (I believe I compared China to Iran), but I do think they’re doing a decent job in putting on these games.
Yeah, I said it. Go ahead and write me angry letters. No, really, my editor will love it. Controversy sells, people! (Too bad this is a free paper.)
I know that China is an oppressive country with a horrible human rights record, but I also think that during the Olympics, for these two weeks and two weeks only, we should put aside our differences.
The Olympics are all about sport, and putting aside politics for the sake of sport. Does that ever really happen? No. But that doesn’t mean we can’t try.
Plus, they’re doing a good job. I can’t ignore the fact that the events seem to be going smoothly, the buildings are gorgeous (that water cube is sweet), and let’s not forget the opening ceremonies. Best. Opening. Ceremonies. Ever. The Chinese know how to put on a show.
Only in a nation that large could they throw 2,008 performers out there for each and every act. Amazing. And the dude on the wire lighting that flame? Super cool. Sure, the air still looks dingy, but I’m giving credit where credit is due. Good job, China.
That doesn’t mean I don’t have complaints—but oddly enough, most of them have to do with the network’s coverage of the events, not China.
For example, who else could do without the human-interest filler stories? A raise of hands, please—yes, that’s what I thought. Look, Bob Costas, go ahead and tell me that a gymnast overcame cancer to get here. By all means inform me that this swimmer is an orphan, but do it with your voice, not a 15-minute mini-movie. No breaks in the action, that’s all I’m asking for.
And that includes doing an interview with President Bush when you should be showing me more events, NBC. It’s bad enough that I have to see footage of Bush in the stands at swimming, basketball, and beach volleyball. I don’t want to listen to him talk, too. That’s just painful.
I’m also sick of hearing about how old Dara Torres is. We get it. She’s 41. She had a baby a few years ago. This is impressive, this is cool. This is not the most interesting thing in the world.
It’s almost like life ends after 40—and after baby. Is this the message they’re trying to get across? I’m more intrigued by the 33-year-old female gymnast from Germany, Oksana Chusovitin. Most of the girls out there are 16. (Except, ahem, the “16-year-olds” from China. But that’s another story.)
While watching gymnastics, I find myself constantly wondering why it’s the only sport at the summer games that seems to have its uniforms designed by drag queens. I also think that gymnasts are the only women left in the world still wearing scrunchies.
And last, but not least, I’m going to complain about Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh. They’re great athletes, but their bikini bottoms are too small. Don’t even get me started on the fact that since they’re not actually touching water, they don’t need to be in bathing suits. Let’s just focus on getting a few more inches of coverage so I’m not constantly being shown cheek.
I just lost all of my male readers. I felt them stop reading, en masse. It’s like a disturbance in the Force. There. Are they back? Good.
All in all, my complaints are few. The Olympics are my favorite sporting event of all time. I just thank G-d that Anthony has a flat-screen plasma television with HD: the only way to watch, baby.
Sports Editor Sarah E. Thien will return to her ‘normal’ self in a week or two. Help talk her down at sthien@santamariasun.com.
This article appears in Aug 14-21, 2008.