Good news everyone! Santa Maria City Council finally approved its public art master plan. The proposed plan divided the city in 2016/2017, pitting developers and conservatives against artists and liberals. Oh no!Ā
Umm. Well, actually, I guess thatās just the same olā, same olā, when it comes to dividing lines. But, guys, it wasnāt the art that split the city. It was a proposed fee on developers that would pay for it. Duh!
Good news everyone! They still havenāt answered the question of what exactly is funding this master plan. Yeah, itās been two years and they still havenāt figured it out. For some reason, the City Council members voted exactly the way they would have voted two years ago: To not levy a fee on developers to pay for putting art up all over town!Ā
So … what happened, city staff?Ā
Why put forward a funding plan that you know your elected bosses are going to vote against? Is it job security or something? Now you get to work on this plan for even longer!Ā
While Santa Maria has an art plan, and wonāt get anything done on it until the cityās artsy residents figure out how to get people to pay for art that could potentially pull tourists in, Solvangās dropping cash like itās hot on tourism schemes!
These two Santa Barbara County cities couldnāt be more different, amirite? I mean, aside from the obvious empty mall downtown versus the āquaintā Danish downtown village.Ā
Solvang and Santa Maria are kind of like county supervisors 3rd District Supervisor Joan Hartmann and 4th District Supervisor Peter Adam. One uses the word Nazi to describe people who donāt believe in climate change, while the other just needs to say that there are actually people out there who donāt believe in climate change. One believes in not spending money on frivolous things while the other believes in spending a buttload of money on frivolity.
Solvang City Council voted to spend about $200,000 on Julefest this year, $60,000 of which is going to put on Aurora Dronealis! Itās a drone light show that you folks can pay $15 to $500 (The VIP Experience, where you get to meet the drone pilots! Oooo. Ahhhh.) to see up close and personal! Wow, guys.Ā
Those big dollar signs come after a rousing fight with the cityās ex-tourism armāthe Solvang Conference & Visitors Bureau (SCVB)āand a bad break-up over marketing, money, and what sorts of events the city should be hosting.Ā
āWe will not host any āf—ingā episodes of The Bachelorette,ā I imagine Mayor Ryan Toussaint screaming to his besty behind a chocolate shop one night. āNot while Iām mayor!ā
That was one of the SCVBās big ideas. It would have cost $30,000, plus itās just so, like, not Solvang, you know?Ā
Yeah, spending twice that on a drone show makes so much more sense!
Wait a minute! I thought the city was trying to tighten its purse strings. Well, at least, thatās what Toussaint told the Sun earlier this year. He didnāt like the way that the SCVB was spending money, and he was going to do something about it!Ā
Now, heās telling the Sun that the whole point of these events is to break even. So weāll see if the city can make its money back on the drone show and a bigger, better, more badass Julefest.Ā
The canary is looking forward to watching the drone show from the air. Send comments to canary@santamariasun.com.
This article appears in Dec 12-19, 2019.

