Move over Alexander Hamilton! Treasury Secretary Jack Lew has announced plans to redesign the $10 bill to replace Mr. H’s image with that of a woman. The new bills are slated to appear in 2020, in time to mark the 100th anniversary of the 19th Amendment, which gave women the right to vote. Huzzah!
I’m just fine with this. But the question on everyone else’s minds is: Who should that woman be? My question is: Will that mean a sawbuck will soon be called a sawdoe? My mind just works that way.
Who should be chosen for the new bill has elicited myriad suggestions ranging from a slew of remarkable women and some not so remarkable, at least in terms of our nation’s history. The list of names has run the gamut from Pocahontas to Dolley Madison. I like Madison as a possibility because then, instead of a calling it a Hamilton, we could call it a 10-Dolley bill!
Sacajawea and Susan B. Anthony shouldn’t even be in the running. They both had their chances with the $1 coin. Martha Washington is also out as she already had her shot on silver certificates in the 1880s. Fair’s fair, ladies!
Other candidates include Eleanor Roosevelt, Harriet Tubman, Betsy Ross, Helen Keller, and Rosa Parks. I have even seen Beyonce, Halle Berry, and Marilyn Monroe suggested. (I kid you not!) People, it’s called a 10-spot because of its value, not because the face on it belongs to a 10!
This has never been an issue with European money because whoever is the reigning monarch gets to have their royal mug plastered on all the currency of the realm. Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II is a fine example of this. The only redesigns Great Britain’s mint has faced have been to update her face to reflect her age. And she has aged remarkably well!
Speaking of people who have aged remarkably well, I have my own candidate to offer up for consideration. It is only logical, because many a time as a youngster I asked her for a 10-spot to go to the mall only to be lectured about the importance of saving my money. I have mentioned her many times here, and it bears repeating to make my case.
That’s right! My mother should be the new face on our $10 bill! She has long been my loan officer, bank, and ATM (Ask Ten from Mom), and I feel she deserves this honor.
Not only has she lent and given me funds when I was short, she has saved me countless thousands over the years by providing numerous services to me as a cook, waitress, nutritionist, maid, laundress, party planner, entertainment director, and life and acting coach. (“Make a good impression. Sit up straight, and act like a lady!”)
She rates high in my book as a fashion consultant. (“You’re not wearing that, now go and change!”)
Mom has served as my attorney, disciplinarian, probation officer, jury, and judge. She has been my psychotherapist, nurse, and EMT, once driving more than 300 miles from an Air Force base at Wendover, Utah (yes, that’s a real place), to a hospital after I was bitten on the chin by a dog at age 3 after she had clearly told me not to bother the doggie!
She has been my spiritual advisor (“God sees you when you do that!”), grand inquisitor, and confessor, always granting forgiveness and one more chance.
I even wrote my own words to the ditty, “Mother” in her honor:
- M is for the Money that you’ve given me,
- O is for the One-dollar bills you’ve sent.
- T is for the Thousands I still owe you,
- H is for the Hundreds that you’ve lent.
- E is for the Earnings that I never seem to save.
- R is for the Reasons why you seek.
- Put them all together and they spell MOTHER,
- And I love you; may I have 10 bucks until next week?
If Mom’s face was on our currency there would be no guilt or lecture attached to asking her to spot me a 10 or two. I’ll just say I love her picture so much that I had to share it with friends, could I please have another? I know my Mom, and I’m telling you, she’ll be tucking bundles of 10s into her purse!
Next month is Mom’s birthday and, as I stated before, she has aged remarkably well. That’s another good reason her face is perfect for our 10-spot. You can crumple it as much as you want, but it will never wrinkle! She looks like a million sawbucks!
The fact that I love her beyond any price and am very proud of her and blessed that she is my mother, whose good looks I inherited, makes her priceless!
Ariel Waterman’s mother, Donna Presta Corea, celebrates her birthday on Aug. 15. Send birthday wishes written on Hamiltons via Ariel’s editor Camillia Lanham at [email protected].
