Friday, October 22, 2021     Volume: 22, Issue: 34

Santa Maria Sun / Canary

The following article was posted on September 15th, 2021, in the Santa Maria Sun - Volume 22, Issue 29 [ Submit a Story ]
The following articles were printed from Santa Maria Sun [] - Volume 22, Issue 29

Veggies and vegetation


Just in case you guys were wondering, 5th District Supervisor Steve Lavagnino is ardently against Brussels sprouts. 

“Brussel sprouts, I’m total anti-Brussel sprout. I’ll come out right now on that one. Anyone that orders it around me has got a problem, because I will tell you to please move it away from me. It smells,” he said at the Santa Barbara Board of Supervisors Sept. 14 meeting. 

Gasp! How could he? Lavagnino is definitely getting a phone call and email from Big Brussels Sprouts over that comment, which was served up in classic Lavagnino fashion—with comedic timing that made an excellent point.

Lavagnino was simply reminding the board that the cap for cannabis grows in the county is a lot lower than caps for things like strawberries or broccoli. In fact, the acreage cap for cannabis is similar to that of Brussels sprouts, so Lavagnino must not be the only anti-Brussels sprouts activist around.

And as long as we’re complaining about odors, I’m going to argue that broccoli growers need to contain the effusive rotten smell that wafts over Santa Maria during harvest season. I hear there is excellent—nay, innovative-—odor-containing technology out there in the world. And I have a feeling you could just ask your local cannabis farmer about what it entails—since Coalition for “Responsible” Cannabis is lobbying that all cannabis farms in the county be required to contain cannabis odors. Talk about a nuisance! 

I’ll take the odor of cannabis over rotting veggies like broccoli, cabbage, or Brussels any day of the week. But I will not stand for the smell of burning vegetation! Or, come to think of it, the actual burning of vegetation, either. 

Apparently, some idiot was really into both and started the Caballo fire on Sept. 6, which burned almost 70 acres in Los Olivos before it was contained. This idiot used a propane-fueled torch to eradicate weeds and vegetation “without a fire department permit,” according to fire investigators. 

OK. So, with a fire permit it would have been fine? 

“The Santa Barbara County Fire Department does not recommend using torches or open flames for weed or vegetation control,” the press release stated, to which I uncontrollably rolled my eyes. Duh! 

Are we not in the midst of another record-breaking fire season in California? What in the world made this person think that would be OK? It could have been a mortal mistake for Los Olivos residents and others. 

I can’t with some people. 

Just like I can’t with the coalition for more regulations against cannabis. Your friendly neighborhood coalition is not satisfied with the strides it’s made in Carpinteria. It wants its rules imposed on every cannabis grower in the county! Such a power trip. And the coalition sure has 3rd District Supervisor Joan Hartmann swaying to the activist rhythms of its cannabis-needs-even-more-regulations beat. 

Odor abatement for all! She’s just super interested in all of the innovations associated with the “whole cannabis thing.”

“I’m hopeful that we’re going to see innovation in other areas as well, and that that could be incorporated into our ordinance at some future date,” she said at the Sept. 14 meeting.

Here, here! Let’s get that out-of-control noxious odor from cabbage, broccoli, and Brussels under control!

The canary is pro anti-smells ordinances. Send innovative technology to

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